“Salad at Thanksgiving is a waste of space.”

Posted on November 22, 2012
lettuce and tomato salad

I would LOVE an invite to this house today. My vote for Grandma of the Day, Helen Philpot, breaks it down for her dysFUNctional family:

“I’m not dead yet. Thanksgiving is still important to me. If being in my Last Will and Testament is important to you, then you might consider being with me for my favorite holiday.”

If any of my cousins are reading this (a few friends could benefit from this one as well):

“Being a mother means you have to actually pay attention to the kids. I have nice things and I don’t put them away just because company is coming over. Mary, watch your kids and I’ll watch my things.”

We’re in agreement that Jell-O should go the way of the Twinkie:

“Cloe, last year we were at Trudy’s house and I looked the other way when your Jell-O salad showed up. This year, if Jell-O salad comes in the front door it will go right back out the back door with the garbage. Save yourself some time honey. You’ve never been a good cook and you shouldn’t bring something that wiggles more than you. Buy something from the HEB bakery.”

Read the whole letter here, it’s hilarious. I wish someone in my family was this direct. Hmmmm….maybe I’ll give it a shot next year. Being banned from my dysFUNctional family Thanksgiving wouldn’t be the worst thing.

[source: MargaretandHelen]